hello,
Hi. my name is chengjiahuiamanda. and i like shitty colours and basketballs. and the piano.im a christian. My blog is a collection of my perspectives, thoughts and emotions.
God bless,
loves amanda.
Tuesday, March 31, 2009
hello:D
maths test was nice:D best maths test in this year, though i had some careless i think):
i think i screwed up viva): i had very little things to talk about that equation):
i was at dhs mail when i came across Xu ZiJia's letter. its quite touching
生命的感动
2008年8月20日，是我生命中一个极不寻常的日子。我去国大医院预约专家门诊做检查，检查的结果让我和我的家人震惊。往日平静的生活被改变了，突如其来的打击使我和我的家人陷入了悲痛之中。看着妈妈伤心地流泪，我只能强忍住泪水来安慰她：我会坚强，我会好起来的！
随着一系列的检查和治疗，疾病带来的痛苦与日俱增。治疗产生的副作用让我难受、呕吐，没胃口，全身无力。更可怕的是口腔溃疡，无法吞咽各种食物。体质变得越来越差，伤口的疼痛也折磨得我苦不堪言。每一天都仿佛是在黑暗里行走，漫长而无助。当我无奈地躺在病床上时，脑海里就会浮想联翩：想以前平常的读书生活，现在看来是多么的幸福和快乐！上课，打球，下棋，与同学学习讨论......。如今，却变成了一种奢侈！往日的生活历历在目，回忆成了我些许的快乐和安慰，而今却一下子掉进了深渊！无助而孤独，恐惧且不安。病魔无情，人间有爱。是老师关心和探望，是同学们的一句句真诚问候与支持，给了我信心和勇气，让我渐渐改变了心情，变得乐观，勇于正视现实，不再逃避，以积极的心态去面对一切挑战！
我是不幸的，同时又是幸运的。在治疗的过程当中，得到了来自社会、学校的很多关怀：老师和同学们积极踊跃地为我捐款，切实解决了我的后顾之忧；CCF的社工为我提供了大量的励志书籍和有关治疗的知识，为我今后的身体保健、饮食习惯的改变提供了依据；MAKE WISHING协会还专门举办了终身难忘的生日派对；老师和同学们常常抽出宝贵的时间来看我，给我带来学校新的资讯的同时，还给我带来了快乐；有的家长还亲自上门送来营养品；老师们更是牺牲休息时间抓紧给我补课；特别是我的班主任Mr.Gi对我的关心和帮助更是无微不至，甚至为方便我去学校，实现我重回学校学习的梦想，让出自己的家，提供给我们住，每天早上来接我上学；现在校长为更加方便我上下学，让我住进学校宿舍......。所有这些让我感受到了人间温暖，在精神上给了我极大的鼓舞和勇气。滴水之恩，当涌泉相报。这些深情厚意已变成一股暖流在身体里涌动，时刻激励着我勇往直前，不畏困难，以微笑来面对明天，我为我是德明一分子而感到自豪。我会努力去上课、补课，把落下的功课尽快补回来，在未来的A水准考试中，尽自己最大努力考出好成绩，以报答关心我支持我的人们，以“诚信勇忠”为宗旨，报答母校——我最挚爱的德明政府中学！真诚地谢谢您，我的老师，我的同学！
I felt really sad when i heard about him. i could understand how much he has suffered. because two years ago, my mom also had cancer. cancer's a scary thing
Just wanted to say that we alll really really hope to see you get better; and jiayous and stay strong.
hello there.
there's a maths test tmr and maths viva.
im scared):
another reason why im not sleeping yet is because my tummy's bothering me.
i had a light dinner. im hungry...
i feel weird. all i can think now about is maths. nothing else.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
headache:O
hello. its been a long time since i last blog.
its been the first day of school but its already horrendously tiring.
i stayed up til now to finish all the hw. ):
hmm. 4 more days to the weekend.
and im looking forward to training tmr:D
its been loong.
Saturday, March 21, 2009
i am feeling sick.
hello there.
i dint go for training cos i and badly bruised. and have a sore throat and feels like i have fever.
sorry teammaties):
gosh.
im not looking forward to later.
to think of it; it was pretty embarrassing last week crying like that.
im really really sorry; thats one reason im not looking forward till later.
go guess the other reason.
im finally gonna do usher tonight!
which, according to tim, i missed 3 times already.
haha. usher's funn.
and i cant help laughing when i think of the journey back from ubin. and the ben and marcus' you jump i jump photo.
the guys were hilarious.
ptff. ive still got a mountainfull of hw undone.
and holidays are coming to an awful end.
maths- half done. la-not done. chinese-half done. history-not done.chem-half done.
by the looks of it. i didnt accomplish much this holidays. i slept most of it away; ):
DECODE- paramore
How can I decide what's right?
When you're clouding up my mind
I can't win your losing fight
All the time
Nor could I ever own what's mine
When you're always taking sides
But you won't take away my pride
No, not this time
Not this time
How did we get here
When I used to know you so well?
How did we get here?
Well, I think I know
The truth is hiding in your eyes
And it's hanging on your tongue
Just boiling in my blood
But you think that I can't see
What kind of man that you are
If you're a man at all
Well, I will figure this one out
On my own
(I'm screaming, I love you so)
On my own
(But my thoughts you can't decode)
How did we get here?
When I used to know you so well?
How did we get here?
Well, I think I know
Do you see what we've done?
We're gonna make such fools of ourselves
Do you see what we've done?
We're gonna make such fools of ourselves
How did we get here
When I used to know you so well?
How did we get here
When I used to know you so well?
I think I know
I think I know
There is something I see in you
It might kill me, I want it to be true
Labels: ):
UBIN
hello:D changed my blog skin:D
i like it; its white enough.:D
ubin was fun but tiring.
lesson learnt: never break on slopes else you risk being thrown off your bike.
my left leg's bruised and swollen and right leg's slightly sprained.
argh,
ps.i think im right about it. too bad.
Labels: im riding my bike with no handlebars.
Thursday, March 19, 2009
happy birthday to me:D
hello:D happy birthday to me:D 15 already:D old):hahaha.thanks for all the birthday wishes(: whether was it through sms or facebook or msn or tags. or just now the bible study:Di really really appreciate them:D
thanks:
jiaqi
yufeng
kelyn
meiyi
jingyan
rynette 4th aunt
chiachia
cherie
venus
lewis
ps david
melissa [junior]
tingyu
limin
elysa
clarisse
big ben
xiao ben
leonard
mitch
meiqin
yienching
jieyu
tessa
jerlyn
sherman
shuqi yeo
wei yu
sarah [senior]
vicky
rennie
huiyun
ailing
shadi
clara
natalie see tong
christina
sophin
rachal lim
taylin
jiamei
sighs. its not my birthday anymore):
i knew you would forget.
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
you dont mean anything at all.
haha. i was reading back on my last post. then i realised that it was mainly venting of anger.
i think i only meant like half of it.
im sick of you.
Sunday, March 15, 2009
Just tell me why?
sometimes; i think. maybe life will be better up there in heaven.
sometimes; i really really wished God will take me back home.
life is so screwed. who do you know that you could even trust?
is there anyone out there that's really trustable?
a person that will stand by you? a person who will give you unconditional love?
a person who will stand by you and say "its okay.." no matter what happened?
im sick of pretending. im sick of pretending who i really am.
its really hard to pretend that you're happpy when you are really down.
its hard to comfort and tell a person that everything's gonna be ok when you are not that okay youself.
or when you are angry at them and you'll have to keep it to yourself and try not to show and be nicey nicey.
its really really hard to put up a nice face and tell people that you're okay with everything when you arent.
is it me or is it the world? has everything changed that much?
in school; church; basketball. its really depressing.
in school;its a new class. so we dont really know much of the ppl.
who are they? what are their characters? are they nice or nasty inside? we dont know.
and i dont want to know. Its like sometimes in school; you'll just want to digg a tunnel and bury yourself in it.
people are real nasty. freaking annoying and irritating. you dont even know who you can trust.
who knows what they really really think about you?
It like you are trying to put up a brave and happy face; but inside you are downright scared and afraid of what's gonna happen.
At home. i feel lousy. i feel incapable. and im sick of trying to live up to your expectations. sometimes. its really disheartening to hear your own parent insult you. though you have tried your best. ive been trying to be a good daughter and i really want you all to appreciate it. i really want you all to comfort me when im sad and not rub it in. i want to feel cared for; to feel loved.
I guess losing my phone was the last straw. i was already very upset already; but then it was the factor that trigger this explosion of saddness. my phone was like my best friend; it was the thing i shared a lot of memories with and the one that was with me no matter what. and now its gone. stolen by a stoopid thief. and then; the best part of it all is that my parents didnt even comfort me at all. they scolded me from the moment they found out. and they rubbed it in hard. really hard. and then i realised; my parents had not comforted me since i was in P3; and i doubt they'll ever do that again.
im really really sick of all this stuff. why cant i just let got of everything.
but then; before i started this post; i probably already knew that there's only one answer to all this problems..
That's God.
imy.
i miss my phone.
Friday, March 13, 2009
CHAR and JIAMEI(:
hello:D im tired but i dont feel like sleeping:O though its lateee.
haha. went out with jiamei and char just now:D no school! yayyy.
it was funn.:D
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
historyhistoryhistory:D!
haha; our history class:D totally loves:D
haha. Mr Chua smil until like very happy.
our whole class wil miss you after you have gone):
you're a great teacher:D
Monday, March 9, 2009
life.
hello:D
im soo tired of everything.
life is full of unanswered questions.
and weird shit that we cant solve.
Saturday, March 7, 2009
you jump, i jump.
hey, finally back.
almost died from exhaustion during flag day, but over all, its ok bah:D
haha.
but then, i lost my jacket:O
hmm. ytd swimming was funny, with the jumping thing:D
"you jump i jump"
hahahahahah. quite scary.
church.
was okay, though i was tired.
nice talking to you caroline:D
spare me, i dont want to end up crying everytime.
Thursday, March 5, 2009
teststeststests):
i just finished my physics revision!:D
haha. im tired but i cant sleep. AGAIN.
B GIRLS:D
Wednesday, March 4, 2009
im so screwed.
feeling much better today; though i have a feeling i screwed chinese test.
there's bio tmr; dunno whether ill fail it:D better not.
osmosis and diffusion and cells. arent that hard i guess.
but who noes.
i just finished the seniors cards. dead tired but sleep. sighs.
im looking forward to the march holis. guess. :D
Monday, March 2, 2009
100 chengyu:D-FINISHED!
whee. i feel so accomplished:D haha. i finished chaoing my 100 chengyu+meaning:D
my handwriting's tweeny tiny:D and mom hates it. hahahahha. but then, the smaller the better:D haha.
MY TWO PAGES WORTH OF 100 CHENGYU! i cant stop looking at it:D i think it's pretty:D
anyways, here are some photo i have yet to upload. haha. my cousin's first birthday!
his cake! it looks nice but doesnt taste that great.
my other funny cousin who wants to drink from the bottle thats even bigger then his body. hahaha!
he walks around the whole room holding the bottle:D v cute!A pic i took with chia on the mrt to the LA play. we arent zhilian okay, we are just amused by the cabin that has no seats! LOL.XD
end of post:D this week's loaded with tests.
ESCAPE:D
a picture speaks a thousands words:D
but then.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
i am the wallpaper.
hello. i havent been posting for a while.
guess its cos there's nothing for me to post about.
church was okay ytd, but then think i screwed up worship rehearsal.
but then i guess it turned out okay in the end.
got to go to yf, jianyun's damn funny.haha.
:D anyways, im going escape later. im scared.
Labels: wallpaper